Cephiros, The One Winged Angel

Hey all, sorry for not updating for nearly 2 weeks. First of all, you’re probably wondering how the diet is going. Still going strong, still have not had regular soda for going on 2 1/2 months.

September 1st, 2007 - 230.5 pounds
September 8th, 2007 - 229 pounds
Total Weight Lost So far - 23 pounds

I did not have much money on Labor day weekend so I did not do much except watch some tv, play some video games, and went to Becky’s BBQ on Sunday. Met a few hot trangender women from Trans-ponder, Mila & Jayna along with their friend Mandy. Some of our other friends were there and I got to see my puppy, Aeris. I miss her alot. Overall it was a great evening.

Last weekend was great as well. Hung out with Christa and other friends at the Ambassador Restaurant on 47th and Sandy. It was my friend Joy’s birthday along with some of her co-workers and her other friends. I had 3 AMFs, got pretty wasted and yes, I did bust my Karaoke cherry. I sang 99 Red Balloons with Joy.

Was supposed to go to the Widmer Oktoberfest at the Widmer brewery but those plans were canceled because she was not feeling well because of a bad headache. Completely understandable, so instead I straighten up the apartment a little and took a nap among other things.

Sunday was a lazy day, took a nap, did laundry and bought some groceries. That’s about it.

Today… well today I went the Muse Concert because last week my friend Bob gave me his ticket since he could not make it because of work. I meet up with Christa but we only saw each other for like 10 minutes since we were in different parts of the concert hall.

Muse was great, for not knowing much of their music, it was really fucking good. I am want to get more of their albums and of course I will see them again once they come back to Portland.

However, it is now time to move onto a new topic. Emotional one so bear with me or don’t read it.

Between the end of the second opening band and the beginning of the Muse. I felt really lonely. I’ve been feeling rather lonely for quite awhile. I mean, here I was at a concert of a band I don’t know too well with no one else there I knew on the ground floor. Sure, My friend Christa was there but we only hung out for maybe 10 minutes at the most.

Seeing all the couples.. it affected my loneliness. I’ve been single for nearly a year. I’ve tried meeting people for dating on Craigslist with no fucking luck. Other dating sites have not proved useful as well. I cannot get out as often as I would like because of my job works me from 8:15am to 4:45pm, Monday through Friday.

I’ve been on this diet because I thought I was/still unattractive to most women out there. I mean sure I’ve lost weight and that’s good for me. I dunno, I am thinking maybe there’s something wrong with me. I just miss having someone around, to talk to, hang out with, be intimate with, kiss, caress and cuddle with. I was really emotional at the show. Before Muse came on, I had to fight back tears cause I was thinking about this alot… it was rather depressing.

I am trying to optimistic, expand my social network, gather more friends, go out and do more. All in all it has been a sucess but I have not found anyone for an romantic interest. *sigh* Sorry about that. Had to let it out.